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Couples Counseling in Florida
Collaborative law is a system that recognizes and addresses not only a couple’s legal needs but also the special needs and interests of children as well as promotes healthy relationships between the divorcing parties. The interdisciplinary work of the collaborative team is invaluable to the couple in transition. Unfortunately, once the divorce process ends, the Collaborative team must disband. Although the team may be re-activated at any time to address future concerns in the post-divorce family, the divorced individuals are left to heal and move past the trauma of divorce without the support of Collaborative professionals.
Some clients are so devastated by the end of their marriage or so entrenched in conflict that they have difficulty dealing with the ordinary demands of life. In that confused state, they must make decisions that will affect them and their children for years to come. In an earlier newsletter, I wrote of the inevitability of post-divorce conflict between former spouses, particularly in cases involving co-parenting. While we can assist our clients to resolve their legal, emotional and financial conflicts during the divorce process, it is optimistic, at best, for Collaborative professionals to assume that preparation will ensure a conflict-free, smooth functioning adjustment to post-divorce life.
For the sake of their children as well as to facilitate their transition to being single, divorced adults must be willing to examine and reflect on their lives, choices and post-divorce relationships with their former spouses. They must continually self-evaluate their desires and direction. However, change is often accompanied by fear, resistance and inappropriate behaviors. Often, what appear to be self-defeating tactics between the former couple, for example, are truly cries for help in the attempt to cope with the trauma of transitioning from married to single, from the old life to a new one. As Collaborative professionals who share a vision of the family system, we must help our clients navigate this extraordinary life transition from beginning to end with that same vision.
We all agree that divorce is a major life transition including much more than simply a court order terminating the marriage. It is a life transition complicated by unfulfilled dreams and profound grief. Divorced families must restructure financially, emotionally and logistically. Divorce brings a nearly impenetrable web of conflicts and resolutions.
While our clients remain unanchored and confused, struggling to replace the old with the new, should we as Collaborative professionals push them from the nest and not assume further responsibility for their post-divorce well-being?
For more info visit http://drdeborahhecker.com/keeping-collaboration-a-part-of-the-post-divorce-relationship/
- Posted on: 2018-08-01 04:38:48
- Classified ad views: 9
- Item ID: 14953704